"Dude, you have a fucking giraffe neck."
On the day of April 27th, 2009, a user by the name of DrForeman decided to create a thread titled The Beast Awakens, which included his weightlifting schedule and technique, as well as a photo of his "progress". Here's what he posted:
Abs finally showing thru.
Just wanted to mark my 2nd year process. Not really looking for tips.
My lifts:
benchpress = 195 x 1 (over 280 if its a machine bench)
squat = 215 x 1deadlift = 225 x 1
I work out 2-3 times a week depending on a schedule (im very busy with school otherwise, math undergrad at a UofWaterloo). If its 2 days then its sat+sun. If its 3 days its mon+wed+fri. I work around 3 major lifts, ie squat + something 1 day, bench + something following day, deadlift + something day after. I do almost no arm work since its hard enough to squeeze all the major compound lifts in 1 week.
I basically do only the following: horizontal/verctical push, horizontal/vertical pull, squat or variation, deadlift or variation.
Usually its more like :
Monday: Squat + chin-ups + dumbbell military press, 8 sets each
Wednesday: bench press + chest supported rowing 10-12 sets each
Friday: Deadlift + shoulder/trap work + maybe arms (if not dead by then)
GL and gimme your feedback. No haters plz.
Along with the creature you see to your right.
Naturally, DrForeman did not escape criticism for his enormous ego, as well as his enormous esophagus. Immediately following the original post, a user by the name of TheSouthernTower posted, "Dude, you have a fucking giraffe neck," to which DrForeman replied, maturely, "fuck you man".
Soon, the moderator poxpower got involved, and all hell broke loose.
"And so another legend begins..."
The thread was soon was filled with hilarious photoshops, related photos, and MS Paintjobs all pointing out the incredible length of DrForeman's neck.
Eventually, DrForeman grew extremely pissed, and posted:
"Fcking nerds you fags are just jealous that I'm smarter and still look better than you it's true as your my mom I fuck her every night"
This only produced more hilarity. Not only was DrForeman mutated from the collarbone to the jaw, but his English skills were lacking.
He eventually grew more pissed, and then posted:
"Fuck you my neck is not a lamp! Eat my dick okay I made a mistake on posting ten picture but you fucking assholes need to fucking stop I know you think it's so fucking funny but it's easy to see your true feelings behind the hate jellously pure jellyously so you nerds do yourselfs a favor in stop and maybe I'll give you some advice later if you want it otherwise just fuck off"
And thus did DrForeman achieve the title of Dick Neck, the man with the phallic throat.
Dick Neck has vowed to someday return to Newgrounds, with the ominous message on his profile posted August 14, 2009:
"well see whos laughin next time i post,
thanks to the girls that pm'd me tellin me to keep goin an bein my hot self, you make it all worth it all the msn sessions were pretty hot too.;)
peace fags we'll see whos laughing next time."
I know I'm jellyous.
DrForeman returned 1 year and 1 day later, on August 15, 2010, and posted the following in his news:
sup fags it's been awhile
you all still a bunch of gay fucking haters or did you grow up n man up like you should have how all ur workouts goin if you lift that is LOL ya rite.
Dick Neck: Origins[]
The whole episode was only on the BBS, a tiny part of Newgrounds traffic and as such, not at all notable, until some Notable animators submitted a moderately succesful flash to Newgrounds: Phobotech, TomaMoto, rumerio, and 9voltproductions, along with our the BBS mods EyeLovePoozy and JadeTheAssassin, collaborated on an epic project to create the story behind Dick Neck's unbelievable windpipe, called "Dick Neck: Origins".
Notable Memes[]
